Stress, reflections and writing

So I have hit a rather unfortunate snag in my writing nope its not writers block its stress,the type of stress that seemed to be dimming my many characters voices and that has angered me. I have been enduring a rather difficult situation at work and the stress revolves around the fact I cannot control the outcome--the outcome for me would be to eliminate the situation, to look at individuals who I felt wronged me and block them out so much so it'll seem like I don't know them. I realize that will never happen because its not realistic what is realistic is that I have to roll with the punches so to speak and deal with it, and deal with it means getting on with my life and in time it'll work out for itself. The truths that I am learning from my recent circumstances are as follows. 1. How people interpret what I do what I say is out of my control What is within my control is how I respond which hasn't been the most positive because I have let my anger get the best of me. 2. Its okay to let my guard down Trust is super important to me and I presume for many people that is also important but what I realize is that once I let down my guard I am at risk to get hurt so I can either live in a shell and only let the people I feel safe within my comfort zone or realize although I will get hurt I have to be optimistic that other people that cross my path will be good people. 3. Its okay to not be liked This reflection was difficult for me I use humor many times to hide my discomfort in social situations because my personality is more of a home body anyways as a writer whose pursuing the difficult dream of getting agent and published I realize many times I will judged by my writing; by critique partners/beta readers freelance editors agents/editors etc and majority of time those individuals may not get my writing and that is okay because it will not reflect who I am as a person so the key is to separate the two which is easier said than done. In conclusion writing is is part of me its been long gone from the outlet I utilized to deal with stress and merged to an actual job, a goal that I will persevere at until I get the results that I want which is to be published via the traditional way. Its fitting I write this post as the new year creeps closer, so my goal for 2013 other than getting a agent/published is to learn to deal with my stress better and realize the world I share with includes some people that will hurt me or have values that does not mesh with my values, and I must decide whether I want that hurt or differences in values consume me to the point I cannot focus on my writing or look at it the sensible way which is I am only in charge of me and also I am only human and will learn to be a better person based on my experiences.

Christmas short story

"Here am I, the servant of the Lord; let it be with me according to your word" Luke 1:38 My mother tucked me in bed, and then opened the book, she's going to read me the story about Mary, during the Christmas holidays I hear this story a lot at church, I snuggled more within the blanket, and focused on mom. She began that the angel Gabriel came to Mary, who thought she was dreaming, the angel told Mary it wasn't a dream and told her about her destiny. I began to drift off in thought about angels I wonder if angels have huge white wings, I watched a super hero movie that had angels, sometimes I wish I was a angel; an angel of the lord, cuz I would travel around the world and help the needy. Mamma, stopped reading and cleared her throat, my mother is like a super hero as if she can read my thoughts, right now the way she’s looking at me with her soft blue eyes; they are so calm even when I do the most naughtiest things. “Mama, I am listening.” I pouted. She smiled, and then began where she had left off, the angel told Mary about her destiny that her child will be Jesus. “Jared, Mary did not think twice she wanted Jesus and accepted that she will have a precious son.”I started to drift off again, my mother is the strongest women I know, I don’t have a father and mom never spoke about him, it’s just been us and I began think about my mother and Jesus mother, my mother has loved me from the moment she laid eyes on me, I know this because she never forgets to tell me, sometimes when I don’t clean my room, or forget to walk the dog, she reminds me a lot which sends me scurrying to clean my room, spic -and -span and take the dog out on a super duper long walk. “Mary accepted, she never questioned the angel, she accepted her fate.” Mama continued. Along their travels Joseph and Mary come upon a man that offered them a place to rest, it is there history was proclaimed. When I think about my mother I wouldn't change a thing, I am eight years old and I have made a promise too, I’ll protect my mother, and never forget to tell her everyday…especially the days I am not my best; that I love her with all my heart, you want to know a secret no matter what I do mamma… she always forgives me and then we bake the best chocolate chip cookies in all of Toronto. My mother loves me the same way Jesus loves us all, I think God gave us all mothers after creating the whole world and the universe he needed mothers to take good care of their children—his children. I hugged my mother, and tell her how much I love her, she lightly kissed me on the cheek and without saying any words I know that she loves me… well not the same as the way she loves the lord…but a close second. The End **I wrote this story for my church it is still a rough draft but I thought since its almost Christmas it seemed fitting to showcase my first short story, I never thought I could write one.

Managing life

Just finished clearing away the cob webs from my ole blog lol, I have been so immersed in work and lack of sleep which I have concluded will never fully be achieved any time soon, so a brief fill in so to speak, I am currently outlining a YA urban fantasy novel that will be epic in the sense of the world building a fair bit of mythological creature that I like. When I write YA books I always use a theme or an issue that teens struggle with for example my first book had theme of bullying, another theme i use often is love conquers all, man against beast man against self. So that's what I have been up to, also I have written six novels from 2009-2012 and I am glad that i finally took the pressure off getting an agent/published and focused on writing and that doesn't mean I have giving up my goal of getting published it just means I am not thinking about that all the time.

Tagged I'm it.

The lovely Eliana Grace tagged me when I am done revising my latest chapter I will showcase an excerpt.

War

I recently found few poems that I had written, I stopped writing poetry because so much was going on at the time finishing college, next becoming a new mother, 2009 I began writing novels that end at 100K and haven't looked back, but I thought it would be fun to show a sample of my two favorite poems I wrote. Alone © Keisha Martin 1997 Here I sit all alone My fingers clenched coldness seeps through my bones. I start to wonder I start to see why there was no one left aside from me The world is cold hungry with fear I wish I had someone near, cradled my body in a ball I take my last breath and give in to the loneliness. That's it I wrote this poem when I was a teen, I wish I could time travel and see my younger self and figure out what was going on when I wrote that poem. Tears Of War © Keisha Martin War how vivid it be The redness of lost souls stains the midnight skies, The children weep but not for long, their hearts frozen forever The cruelness astonishing as can be Woman cry and hold their womb They would not see their precious ones The stillness of the night, leaves a mystery A nation destroyed on the mercy of the innocence When will the tears end and laughter roar, when will the green grass blow again in the hot summer sun When will all men be treated as one When.

Woes of changing things...like the ole blog

I have come to realize I am the type of person that needs to change things. One of which is my home... well that's more a stress reliever thing, anyways changing my blog has become a habit I change my blog sometimes more than I actually write on the blog, but the problem with change things don't always work out to better than the former change. For example I changed the design which I love thanks to people that enable free backgrounds anyways I hit a snag when all my lovely side pics, etc were sent to the bottom and I spent hours trying to figure out the layout issue so I have given up and perhaps when I am less frustrated I will figure it out so I hope you the reader will enjoy my blog background and now to write whilst I battle my flu.

K.M. Jackson

I am so excited to introduce K.M. Jackson, who I met about a year ago via twitter there are many attributes that I like about K.M. Jackson but the main one is how genuine she is to her fellow writers, K.M. is positive and offers motivation to others when she announced her book deal I was so happy for her because its well deserved for a great person. So enough of my chatter take it away K.M. Jackson. Thanks so much for having me here today Keisha to talk writing and THROUGH THE LENS. My first thought upon seeing your questions was, wow, tough questions! But I hope I can do them justice and give your readers something to go on or at least an opportunity to say, that K.M. is a piece of work maybe I should pick up her book. LOL. So now to the questions… Here goes. Describe your path to publication? What were the highlights and stumbles along the way? My path to publication has not been a straight one. I always tell people that as a kid I always had two “when I grow up” dreams. I guess both my dreams came from mostly living half my life in my own little “dream state” of having my nose buried in either a fashion magazines or a romance book. I went from being a science and math geek in high school to a fashionista and attending FIT for college. Then I spent years in the not quite so glam world of New York fashion. After 10 years designing for New York houses (and then losing my perfect caregiver for my twins) I left that world to be a stay at home mother. Not long after (with a few tries a various freelancing endeavors. Yes, that was me with the nametag organizing your closet.), I started to pursue my 2nd dream to be a being a writer. And bam! 10 short years later and 6 or it could be 7 manuscripts later (I may have blocked 1 out) and more rejections than I would ever dare count I’m finally debuting my first romance THROUGH THE LENS. Clapping here is allowed. What were the challenges? The challenges were getting back to the page and writing after yet another rejection. As I said above and it’s really no joke there were yes, more rejections than I could count and more near misses. So many of the ‘oh you are so close’ and ‘please think of us and send us your next work’ letters. Well, I’ll tell you, I think I wanted to scream more at those than the flat out rejections at times. It was like, why won’t someone just put me out of my misery? Why string me along with this just give it one more try stuff? But you know what? I did give it one more try and kept giving it one more try and still do to this day. I guess I always will. It’s my never say die make up. As writers we are always up for criticism and possible rejections and my constant challenge is fear and the blank page. I have to always tell myself to just give it one more go. That the next work may be better and it may be that “yes” that I’ve been waiting for. Besides I have to live the words I tell my kids every day. What is at the heart of the enduring appeal of romance, for reader? Now this was the tough one. I think that this is a broad question and people may read romance for many different reasons. I know that I do at different times of my life. Sure, I can easily break it down and say they are there for the happily ever after but it may not be as easy as that. I think the romance reader is a lot more complex than just the happily ever after and they are there for more. The developing stories and the interesting characters, the high emotions and yes, the chance to for a while escape to another world. I know, for me, it all depends on my mood at the time and where I want to go in that moment to get the emotional story satisfaction that I’m looking for. What advice do you have for beginning writers? My advice for the beginning writer would be to keep writing. And then write some more. That “No writing is wasted” saying (that I’ve long hated) turns out to be true. The more you write the better you get and the more you learn to trust yourself and your voice. Happy Writing! Well at least as happy as your mood can make it on any given day. Just get to the page and write. That will make you happy. Thanks so much once again for having me here today Keisha. It’s been a real pleasure. And now a bit about THROUGH THE LENS available now from Crimson Romance Mika Walters is a normal woman working in the not so normal world of New York Fashion. As long time assistant to uber sexy photographer Alejandro Vargas she’s tired of being the girl in the background. Just once she wants Alejandro to look at her with the same smoldering look he gives to his willowy models and now she has her chance. Stranded. After a travel mishap where the rest of the crew and the models can’t make the remote location shoot for another three days Mika is taking her moment to catch Alejandro’s eye and put herself in front of Alejandro’s camera and if all goes to plan, his bed… at least until the real world catches up with them. Alejandro doesn’t know what’s gotten into Mika maybe it’s the sand, maybe it’s the sun, but he doesn’t really care. All he knows is that he’s finally opened his eyes and is seeing her clearly for the first time as the smart, gorgeous and incredibly irresistible woman she is. But why can’t she realize that what he’s feeling for her is not one of his usual one, well, three night stands? This is real. Real love, real passion. What’s it going to take for him to prove to Mika that she’s the woman he wants? Now and forever. available from Amazon Barnes & Noble iTunes K.M. Can be found on here blog twitter

Writing Goal(s)

Seems Fall...or close to the Fall season is a good enough time to revisit the ole goal(s) for writing, firstly I am proud of myself that I haven't giving up my dream and still writing since 2010, I am currently getting help from a wonderful editor who knocked sense into me which resulted in me rewriting the manuscript chapter by chapter, so I guess that's the goal, the only one keep going, hoping because I believe that getting published is so important to me the more I persevere hopefully I will see positive results.

Writer's sharing knowledge

Wonderful article that was so good, I had to come out of my blogging respite to share, it brought many things into perspective and why there are so many factors that contribute to finding a great agent, getting published, and success selling books etc.

Blogging funk.

So my plan of blogging frequently once again is a goal that is easier said than done, I must admit I am having a hard time figuring out this blogging routine, and I realize its because at times I feel like I don't know what to say in regards to writing that hasn't been said,by other bloggers. For example I can say the same thing and twist it to reflect my personality but my heart seems as of late somewhat not feeling the blogging routine, but I know that its necessary for myself as an aspiring author to have a blog so if and when I get an agent published I already have a platform. The other issue is that many times I feel like what can I say that sets me apart from someone else that is enduring similar things as they journey through their publishing goal, and then it hit me its not about setting myself apart from others actually when I thought like that it now sounded quite cocky, so I had to humble myself and tell myself each person although on the same path responds different makes decisions different that leads to a different direction, I won't divulge about many authors that have self published did well financially, gained agent, publisher etc. So what will my plan be, well I decided I won't put pressure on myself when I have things to talk about I will write about it, because only then will my passion show, its not a race which could be why I was struggling and also another truth blogging is not about numbers, I do check out blogs of authors/writers with five thousand plus followers and some that have numbers similar to mine, the numbers to me does not on a large scale determine whether someone will buy authors book or will follow authors or aspiring authors journey, blogging is like writing a manuscript in a way...its only possible when the passion is involved I have tons of ideas many that is stored in notebooks labelled with dates when I will write them but I have not gone to that bin because the idea that pops in my head that fuels my passion is what I tend to write, for example week of July 2-6 these are the ideas that spawned. 1. Inspired by Stephen King short story THE BODY( I watched Stand By Me and the spark came and I said " I would love to write a novel inspired by movie and book, the idea lasted two days.) 2. Inspired by Stephen King Needful things (This was due to J.K Rowling new novel for adults a individual made a comment that the book sounds a lot like Needful Things,boom inspired that fizzled in a few hours 3. Snow White (I saw Snow White and the Huntsman) The idea to make my twist on this story that has been written so many times fizzled within a few hours as well, then came the idea with passion a steampunk, I knew that it was filled with passion because I wrote an outline and researched right away. I also have a file on my wall that reads next outline to choose, the next projects were a few adult steamy romance and a Dystopia novel again based on Stephen King Running Man, three books by Stephen King that has me inspired wow that scared me because normally I don't read too much of said author books aside from the ones I mentioned. So that is it, the point of this long post is write with passion and I will conclude my post with an excerpt of a poem I adore. Fire And Ice From what I tasted of desire, I hold with those who favor fire. Robert Frost One of my favorite poet.

Waiting to Exhale F%^&*

I am not back for long, just wanted to drop by the ole blog, man this year has been hard the saying is so true for my life now when it rains it pours, dealing with a disrespectful and revengeful coworker to a stranger that I had a small fender bender with that is trying to hustle money. I was thinking the other day have I been under a freaking rock, in which I just realized how heinous people can be in life, or maybe I was naive at any rate my strength to push on has been tested, but I cannot falter I have dreams to chase and also reality check I am a mom, a wife and I must live, so as I approach my summer holidays, two months off and a wonderful vacay in sunny Jamaica mon, I will look back at the year and say I did it, made it through day by day even though in the moment I felt like the darkness of my experiences was suffocating me, I know that I am not the only one that endures stuff like this and someone somewhere is going through worst shituations (no spelling error I just made up this word)

Lending a hand to hope

Natalie Bahm has been promoting a amazing event in support of a beautiful child please click on the link to read the important event, I must come out of my semi-blogger hiatus to help spread the word. I hope plenty of people, writers who stumble upon this post will consider offering support by checking out the auction. Here is the information from Natalie's blog about Jayden. Jayden Huynh is a seventeen-month-old little boy who has already survived four surgeries--two bowel, one heart, one gastric-- due to a combination of congenital problems, including Hirschsprung's disease and other issues that are still in the process of being diagnosed. Despite the best efforts of his doctors and family, Jayden has failed to gain enough weight to make it to even the 1st percentile. He only weighs 6.6 kilograms (14.5 pounds) and his low weight is affecting his organ's ability to function. His doctors are considering put him on TPN treatment (IV feeding) which carries its own dangers. The greatest risk to survival is sepsis at the site of his IV port, so Jayden's family need to convert a room in their home into a treatment room that can be kept separate and as sterile as possible in order to give him the best possible chance. This will include buying a small refrigerator/freezer to store the TPN, cabinets for storing medical supplies, a changing table for Jayden, a steam cleaning unit to keep the surfaces as clean as possible, and other supplies. Jayden's family have started a fund to try and raise money to set up this room, and are hoping to hold an auction to make it possible. Because Jayden's grandmother is a writer and an artist, they are hoping to gain donations from people in these industries to auction. Anything useful would be gratefully accepted, whether it be critiques, books, swag, etc. Because of the international nature of the auction, donors would need to be willing to ship items directly to their auction's winner, if it involves goods. We will provide information and links to the donor's websites, etc. along with each auction. The auction is set to begin on June 2 and will probably run for about a week. We've already had some awesome stuff donated, including agent critiques and phone calls, author critiques, signed books, jewelry and art. It's going to be amazing. Mark your calendars. If you feel you can donate anything for the auction or pass this along to friends who might want to help, it would be so appreciated. You can email me if you have an item or critique that you'd like to donate at nataliebahm (at) yahoo.com. If you'd like to help and you have nothing to donate you can always say a prayer, send good wishes to the family, or spread the word! We have a facebook account, a twitter account, and a blog you can follow, like, retweet, or repost. Jayden is such a brave little boy and his family has been through so much already. I know they're already overwhelmed by thie kindness the writing community has shown. We hope this auction will take a tiny bit of the financial pressure off of them, so they can focus on caring for Jayden. Thank you so much, for taking the time to read this. Source: http://nataliebahm.blogspot.ca/

Writing when feeling horrible

I am enduring a terrible situation at work in which my emotions have fluctuated from anger to sadness to disbelieve, I didn't feel the need to write, my muse was not flowing ideas, I felt like a dark cloud was over me, I really wanted to give in and accept that it was okay, but I didn't because I realize my emotions was not caused by writers block and I went over the situation and realized I wasn't going to let it defeat my dream, so I wiped my tears and wrote, now likely what I wrote will be cut eventually, because I will realize it either didn't make sense or didn't do the scene justice and I like to give a decent effort even when I write my first draft. Faith is also really good, believing the ugly situation I am faced with will be rectified and it will be a horrible memory that would eventually leave my thoughts if I let my emotions get the best of my dream of getting published if and when that happens how would I cope with certain things like deadlines, reviews, or other task, now I am not saying its never okay to take time to oneself but for me I feel writing helps me cope it is my outlet to deal with stress it is the career that I hope one day will be something I do on a full time.

DISCLAIMER:Due to copyright I cannot showcase the image, therefore I have to take pictures down, word of advice to writers please ensure you do not take images from Google or any source that is copyright in case of repercussions.

I am back, well sort of, so what has been happening well still honing and revising my first novel, finished two novels during the winter, looking forward to the summer in which I can get in a better groove to finish the latest wip I am working on and blogging on a regular schedule. Going on a mini blog hiatus has taught me a few things but the most significant that I continue to stick by is me being myself and also the online world although vast is quite small, things get around so my focus is to not dwell on others success and get in a glum mood that my opportunity will not come, I made a commitment to strive at my goal towards publication and the rest of stuff that I will never be able to control I will leave it be. Plus I decided as well if I don't love a book, I will keep it to myself, there is too many challenging things that go along with writing so its not nice I think to add to an author/writer challenge by giving a bad review, which brings me to this point although I like Goodreads because I am introduced to books that I may never pick up at my local bookstore it is also a venue in which people express their feelings about books and some are quite nasty. Lastly I have had couple good news which pumps me up to work even harder, sometimes the small strides make the journey worth it. So I will resume my mini blog hiatus to polish ECLIPSE my YA paranormal romance until then a random feature I will add my crush of the week the one and only Ian Somerhalder

Lucky 7 Meme Award Rules:

1. Go to page 77 of your current manuscript.
2. Go to line 7.
3. Copy the next 7 lines (sentences or paragraphs) and post them as they're written. No cheating!
4. Tag 7 other writers to pass this meme on to.

MY EXCERPT

Great. Another dream about him.
Been a while since I had one of those. Aside from shoving Kayla into the lockers, I hadn’t seen or heard from, the faceless figure since Volterra, Italy sort of promised he would leave me alone for a bit after the craziness there, but I should’ve known better than to believe he was capable of telling the truth, maybe he wanted to gloat that he had self control for not ripping Kayla’s body to smithereens. He stood beneath the oak tree that looked ancient, maybe as old as him. Not that I had any clue how old he was.

Lucky 7

Roni Loren
Cece
L.M Preston
Julie Cross
Matthew Merrick
Nina D'Angelo
Natalie Bahm

MY FIRST AWARD

To accept your nomination, please do the following:
SUNSHINE AWARD
Thank the person who gave it and provide a link to them.
Write a post about it.
Answer the questions below
Pass it on to 10 bloggers you know and who you really enjoy reading.
10 QUESTIONS & MY ANSWERS

I would like to thank the lovely Kelbian Noel for this award a fellow blogger that lives in my neck of the woods Toronto (woo hoo)
1. Favorite color: purple

2. Favorite animal: This is very difficult, I like many animals
3. Favorite number: Two

4. Favorite non-alcoholic drink: Water

5. Facebook or Twitter: Twitter! I like both, but deciding two years ago to become a writer I have had to enforce serious discipline to limit my stay on these sites, it is very distracting

6. My passion: WRITING

7. Getting or giving presents: I rather be the giver
8. Favorite pattern: abstract with plenty of colours

9. Favorite day of the week: Friday

10. Favorite flower: Roses

*I will think about the ten bloggers to pass the award onto, then make a list of their sites

1<RONI LOREN


2.Tetonia Blossom

3.Caroline Starr Rose

4.RELICS OF PROVIDENCE

5 NINA DANGELO


6.CECE READ AND WRITE

7.LYNNETTE LABELLE


8.DENISE OF INGLESIDE

9.SHANONA WRITER




10. STEPHEN PORTER

REVISIONS

Currently I am working hard revising my first novel a YA Paranormal romance, recently I hit up my editor with a few questions, and also needing reassurance if it was normal that as things change so will my novel, she said it was normal and it is a scary feeling knowing the revision I made a year ago will not end the way it looked in my mind, and I am okay with that. I feel this means I am growing as a writer I am getting better because I am working hard at executing a great story that will hopefully not mimic what's on the shelves, my ediitor told me as well to let myself get in the world of my characters and normally I am a stubborn person but the funny thing is the characters that we spend so much time with because they are talking to us in our minds at times do take the wheel and steer the story, I came up with a new character that I never expected but I went with it because that is what the story needs, now I have to figure out how will he mesh with the main character, the antagonist to continue the plot, conflict etc.

Without Love I shall not be inspired

1 Corinthians 13:4–8a
(English Standard Version)
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.

THE WAY WE FALL

THE WAY WE FALL One of the best things about being an aspiring author is supporting fellow authors and it gives me great pleasure to spotlight the talented Megan Crewe. I first heard of Megan when I went to a workshop few years ago and the facilitator handed out samples of queries that worked and gave a break down of why such as the hook etc. I was captivated by Megan because it was the only YA query and I am a sucker for paranormal novels plus she had a unique twist that I never saw in other teen novels before.The query was for GIVE UP THE GHOST.Here is the blurb for THE WAY WE FALL: When a deadly virus begins to sweep through sixteen-year-old Kaelyn’s community, the government quarantines her island—no one can leave, and no one can come back. Those still healthy must fight for dwindling supplies, or lose all chance of survival. As everything familiar comes crashing down, Kaelyn joins forces with a former rival and discovers a new love in the midst of heartbreak. When the virus starts to rob her of friends and family, she clings to the belief that there must be a way to save the people she holds dearest. Because how will she go on if there isn't? I can't wait to read this book, it will be the top of my book list when I go on my book spree next week at Chapters. I hope you pick this book up and if you are Canadian please support this amazing Canadian writer.

REFLECTIONS (long post)

February is around the corner which will start the beginning of Black History Month, I reflect during this month because I am appreciative of many courageous people of colour in the past that paved the way for me to have many opportunities today, such as freedom to have an education, to work in an environment in which all employees are treated with equality and an organization such as my union that ensures the equality is being upheld. So it breaks my heart when violent crimes continue to happen that generally relates to the black community, and I want to emphasize my perspective is based only on my city, my community. Recently within the community I live in which to be honest used to be plagued with plenty of crime; drug dealers, increase in violence the law enforcement made a huge effort to apprehend the culprits and bring back peace to my community, a man last week was killed in cold- blooded act of violence the culprit was like a soulless human and the violent act shook the community and got together to mourn the loss of the victim but also mourning the loss of so many young black man that have lost their lives to violence. Now the flip side of this is as a Child Youth Worker I have worked with young black males that made poor choices and as a result crimes were committed against them such as gang involvement/drugs etc I think sometimes a person may want to change their lives on a positive path but others that want to continue that lifestyle and still want that person to join them will not let them move on, I think its like the 'gang mentality" feels the person is turning their back on them telling them they are now better than them. I hope when my girls grow up they would live in a world people value one another, people can resolve issues withought wanting to kill another human being.

MUSE: DON HENLEY

My blogging is pitiful especially when I clearly posted I will blog Monday's and Friday's the reason is this, I have not found a comfortable balance in which I can write, work, mom duties, remembering as well I am a spouse and lastly reading which is a must for aspiring writers such as myself. Although this year I promised I would not call myself an aspiring writer...here it comes the big word that has scared me for so long because its taking me awhile to accept I indeed is a writer. I have earned that title because the circles under my eyes have given me that honor lol. Now I will aspire to be an published author man that is so easy rolling off the tongue in reality its slow as molasses but worth it so my perseverance will never be compromised this is what I want and I won't stop honing my craft until it happens. So to my 32 followers and future followers in blogger space I have not forgotten you and thank each and every one of you that chose to follow me even when I don't blog everyday.

Showing my work...eek I'm gonna hurl

I am terrified of showing my work, whoa I know that is something I must overcome, no writer can write and dream of publication without taking that brave step into showing their work. That is a major step throughout the journey and after 9agent/publishing house editor) So 2012 I have decided to take a leap and showcase my writing, as of late I have entered an anthology contest hosted by the Canadian Authors Association, and recently I entered contest here


I always assume its a long shot I will win, but last year I won a few books and a critique which I guess is not the same as getting a critique from an agent but another goal for 2012 is for me to appreciate all the scary strides I take and each mss I complete even in its rough bare butt glory its still a finished manuscript that I can at least tweak. So far I have written five mss, my madness led me to conjure up a plan if I have a few mss in different genres (POLISHED) perhaps that will enable me to boost my chances of getting signed by a wonderful agent, I am writing a YA SCI-FI next in which the aliens will kick butt for a bit and then all will be well...maybe. But, every hour, sec I get new ideas and another of my madness I have outlines for several ideas these occurred summer 2011 while at park with my girls so I will slow down check those ideas after I write sci-fi and see which will stick. in addition, I write adult novels so I may write one this summer as an aspiring writer I want to balance YA/Adult mss, okay that's all for now its 1:15a.m and no coffee but wide awake so I will get a book and read until my eyes feel like cement.

Reviews rants

Today I have been on goodreads a bit, because fab blogger extraordinaire Roni Loren CRASH INTO YOU was released and I bought it and then wanted to add it to my what I'm reading stash, but as I pansied my way I located discussions of reviews.
I won't say the name to protect the anonymity of the author but basically this writer's book won't be out for a few days and people were just giving really bad reviews left right and center so to speak.

I totally understand it's the nature of the biz when a writer gets published and then officially becomes an author. I don't want to sound like a hypocrite as well because I have slammed one author's book on a few comments and I regret that, and have used the excuse I was learning and wasn't too smart about the etiquette of online behavior, I think like any critique it has to be constructive rather than intentions to hurt the person, and again another truth when I had said those things about the author it was my insecurities of not getting my 'big break' but every one's big break comes different and their success is something that should not be judged.

if their book gets optioned for a movie that is something that is cool but not something they did on their own many people was part of that; agents, book to film scouters, I am not sure if that's what they are actually called but that's what I'll call them anyways, the point is as a community of talented peeps we must express our reviews based on an objective position and not the position to tear someone down, just so that icky feeling inside is resolved, the truth is when I did inappropriate behaviors like troll a fan-site of a particular author I felt horrible and wouldn't want that to happen to me.