Life

  Silence. 

 Scream. 

 Couldn't utter a word but what was felt. 

 Darkness clutching the throat. 

The threat of the freight train crashing.

Tearing apart happiness the cloud that hovered. 

Shifting into the abyss of my  tortured past.

 The forgiveness that was once craved will never be a reality.

 The thing that was known for absolute certain.

 Was that there had to be a time to let go.

 To focus on things that meant more.

Understanding the honest truth.

 That  had to hit the hard slab of concrete. 

Rock bottom to begin climbing to the top. 

 Life sometimes is full of uncertainty. 

Quick sharp turns. 

Keisha Martin

Diversity

Recently I got in  debate on social media with a writer, I didn't know this writer I saw his post in my timeline and got worked up. premise he wanted to get feedback on his  setting in which was predominately inhibited by people of colour. 

It hit a nerve. 

The reason: for years people of colour experiences whether fiction or non-fiction has been written by Caucasian people, before I go on I would be remiss to not say said author clarified the story idea was his and was not inspired by the setting simply  the setting worked for his story but I was confused he wanted feedback to make sure the setting was accurate he had visited the location but wanted someone from the setting to help authenticate the setting etc.

I was still worked up even though I accepted his response in order to move on from the debate, the issue is that to date the publishing sector has not made huge strides in publishing more books with diverse characters or acquired more authors of colour  and to suggest perhaps there are not enough diverse authors wanting opportunity to get their work published is not true I am one of such writers, even though I am not ready to seek an agent or get my mss published I am also a reader and it would be so refreshing to read more diverse books especially in the genres I write (YA/Adult romance)I was also thinking and this may be a quirky thought what if within novels authors make an active attempt to feature diversity via their character or a Caucasian character making an observation it doesn't have to be so obvious to make a point which will likely start another debate but worked naturally in the story, that is what I do in all my WIP I want my fictional world to have some aspect of my community, my city.       






Keisha Martin

Determining Burst of Creativity

I am slowly getting back to editing and I cannot determine when my burst of creativity will occur, while I edit a very rough manuscript that I have ripped apart at least twice now.

My burst of creativity when I edit happens at weird moments in which my creativity flows and I can write or edit an entire chapter, I am still working on my ER removing a fair bit of the plot that does not make sense.

The biggest hurdle for me is the conflict of the main characters I have to go through each scene as if I have a magnifying glass and I write down in notebook things about the main character that makes sense.


I am hoping during the two months I am off I can edit more and hopefully finish my book and 2021 begin the arduous task of querying which I have not done since I prematurely died in 2010.


My last post I mentioned getting back to writing after my cancer diagnosis some days are challenging due to spontaneous pain that inhibits me from reading my manuscript, but days of feeling this pain is sometimes weeks and months apart so better days I am taking advantage. 






Keisha Martin

Chronicling my cancer journey

Last November I was diagnosed with stage II breast cancer, it appeared as if time had slowed and then got faster, variety of emotions,  feeling out of control in regards to countless test, touched by so many practitioners, surgery, and then treatment. 

Throughout the entire process of treatment I wrote down my experience looking back at my notes it seemed I was reliving the entire circumstance again but it didn't sadden me I applauded myself that I pushed on and endured it truth of the matter I didn't have a choice. I didn't read or work on my drafts I had so many days I was so sick from the side effects of chemo, and I think being sick played a huge role of writer's block I couldn't think clearly. I was fortunate to have a solid support system and also online support groups of women and men that also experienced cancer as well.

I am six months in remission and although I do get scared about cancer returning I must live, it took me  awhile to get to this point it feels great to get back to the things that make me happy such as writing and continuing my dream, getting cancer truly made me look at life different--I appreciate the simplistic things in life I don't take things for granted and getting cancer I feel it was a sign to slow down prior to cancer I consumed myself in work, I worried what people thought about me, stressed about finances, my kids etc. All that has changed I feel getting cancer enabled me to be a better version of me, for the first time I am comfortable in the skin I am in and looking at my scars from my mastectomy I appreciate the beauty of my scar.

When will it be me

Its that time of year at the Elementary school I work at,  the annual book fair, I must admit I am generally more excited than the students so many books, the smell of new books 😆I don't restrict myself  by reading particular genres, I enjoy reading Children/ Young Adult books I write in these genres along within the adult  genre, with a strong emphasis on coming of age love, falling in and out of love,  heartbreak  and NSFW stories.

I am experiencing once again when will it be me and then that quickly turns into I have to find the time to edit my completed rough draft manuscript(s) and the numerous ideas of a new story that happen daily, I find when I am editing new stories come in my thoughts but that's another blog topic 😊

  I really want to be a traditional published writer but I have taken that pressure away because they're many opportunities to get my writing published, and either way a writer chooses one has to research the variety of nuance of traditional vs self-publishing.

So for now I will appreciate the authors that continue to pave the way, and I will keep being persistence, in my  efforts, no writer has ever talked about writing being a smooth effort, writing at times is  grueling but what keeps me going is my desire to tell stories.

Writing, grief, and new beginnings.

I'll start off by saying that although my writing routine slowed down after my spouse passed I have began to slowly write, whether its jotting down idea's that come to me all hours of the day, usually the wee hours at night, and I have recalled a few dreams relating to the latest WIP I am working on.

I have also been reading plenty of books in a variety of genres most recent a YA called Everything, Everything and so glad that the movie followed which stuck close to the book, but what I really liked was the diversity which the author Nicola Yoon was part of the diverse books movement, and also the author was born in Jamaica and that's inspiring for me as a aspiring author. So I hope 2017 will continue be a year in which I work hard on my WIP's and hope for the best, writing a great book takes time and its comforting to come to a place in which I am okay with not rushing and enjoying the process in which I can control.

Beloved spouse

On November 14th 2015 life slowed down
you had slowed down and then the last breath of life left you
you had given the fight of your life.
you left so many that loved you but the choice wasn't yours and we have to accept it wasn't our choice either.

Needing answers that would never come all that is left is the memories
to comfort me to shake me out of a slumber that I dread to take

November 14th 2015 life slowed down
you slowed down and took your last breath
I remember your eyes, I remember your tears

I will always remember you.


Dedicated to my husband who is watching me and his girls until we meet again.