Life

  Silence. 

 Scream. 

 Couldn't utter a word but what was felt. 

 Darkness clutching the throat. 

The threat of the freight train crashing.

Tearing apart happiness the cloud that hovered. 

Shifting into the abyss of my  tortured past.

 The forgiveness that was once craved will never be a reality.

 The thing that was known for absolute certain.

 Was that there had to be a time to let go.

 To focus on things that meant more.

Understanding the honest truth.

 That  had to hit the hard slab of concrete. 

Rock bottom to begin climbing to the top. 

 Life sometimes is full of uncertainty. 

Quick sharp turns. 

Keisha Martin

Diversity

Recently I got in  debate on social media with a writer, I didn't know this writer I saw his post in my timeline and got worked up. premise he wanted to get feedback on his  setting in which was predominately inhibited by people of colour. 

It hit a nerve. 

The reason: for years people of colour experiences whether fiction or non-fiction has been written by Caucasian people, before I go on I would be remiss to not say said author clarified the story idea was his and was not inspired by the setting simply  the setting worked for his story but I was confused he wanted feedback to make sure the setting was accurate he had visited the location but wanted someone from the setting to help authenticate the setting etc.

I was still worked up even though I accepted his response in order to move on from the debate, the issue is that to date the publishing sector has not made huge strides in publishing more books with diverse characters or acquired more authors of colour  and to suggest perhaps there are not enough diverse authors wanting opportunity to get their work published is not true I am one of such writers, even though I am not ready to seek an agent or get my mss published I am also a reader and it would be so refreshing to read more diverse books especially in the genres I write (YA/Adult romance)I was also thinking and this may be a quirky thought what if within novels authors make an active attempt to feature diversity via their character or a Caucasian character making an observation it doesn't have to be so obvious to make a point which will likely start another debate but worked naturally in the story, that is what I do in all my WIP I want my fictional world to have some aspect of my community, my city.       






Keisha Martin

Determining Burst of Creativity

I am slowly getting back to editing and I cannot determine when my burst of creativity will occur, while I edit a very rough manuscript that I have ripped apart at least twice now.

My burst of creativity when I edit happens at weird moments in which my creativity flows and I can write or edit an entire chapter, I am still working on my ER removing a fair bit of the plot that does not make sense.

The biggest hurdle for me is the conflict of the main characters I have to go through each scene as if I have a magnifying glass and I write down in notebook things about the main character that makes sense.


I am hoping during the two months I am off I can edit more and hopefully finish my book and 2021 begin the arduous task of querying which I have not done since I prematurely died in 2010.


My last post I mentioned getting back to writing after my cancer diagnosis some days are challenging due to spontaneous pain that inhibits me from reading my manuscript, but days of feeling this pain is sometimes weeks and months apart so better days I am taking advantage. 






Keisha Martin

Chronicling my cancer journey

Last November I was diagnosed with stage II breast cancer, it appeared as if time had slowed and then got faster, variety of emotions,  feeling out of control in regards to countless test, touched by so many practitioners, surgery, and then treatment. 

Throughout the entire process of treatment I wrote down my experience looking back at my notes it seemed I was reliving the entire circumstance again but it didn't sadden me I applauded myself that I pushed on and endured it truth of the matter I didn't have a choice. I didn't read or work on my drafts I had so many days I was so sick from the side effects of chemo, and I think being sick played a huge role of writer's block I couldn't think clearly. I was fortunate to have a solid support system and also online support groups of women and men that also experienced cancer as well.

I am six months in remission and although I do get scared about cancer returning I must live, it took me  awhile to get to this point it feels great to get back to the things that make me happy such as writing and continuing my dream, getting cancer truly made me look at life different--I appreciate the simplistic things in life I don't take things for granted and getting cancer I feel it was a sign to slow down prior to cancer I consumed myself in work, I worried what people thought about me, stressed about finances, my kids etc. All that has changed I feel getting cancer enabled me to be a better version of me, for the first time I am comfortable in the skin I am in and looking at my scars from my mastectomy I appreciate the beauty of my scar.

When will it be me

Its that time of year at the Elementary school I work at,  the annual book fair, I must admit I am generally more excited than the students so many books, the smell of new books 😆I don't restrict myself  by reading particular genres, I enjoy reading Children/ Young Adult books I write in these genres along within the adult  genre, with a strong emphasis on coming of age love, falling in and out of love,  heartbreak  and NSFW stories.

I am experiencing once again when will it be me and then that quickly turns into I have to find the time to edit my completed rough draft manuscript(s) and the numerous ideas of a new story that happen daily, I find when I am editing new stories come in my thoughts but that's another blog topic 😊

  I really want to be a traditional published writer but I have taken that pressure away because they're many opportunities to get my writing published, and either way a writer chooses one has to research the variety of nuance of traditional vs self-publishing.

So for now I will appreciate the authors that continue to pave the way, and I will keep being persistence, in my  efforts, no writer has ever talked about writing being a smooth effort, writing at times is  grueling but what keeps me going is my desire to tell stories.

Writing, grief, and new beginnings.

I'll start off by saying that although my writing routine slowed down after my spouse passed I have began to slowly write, whether its jotting down idea's that come to me all hours of the day, usually the wee hours at night, and I have recalled a few dreams relating to the latest WIP I am working on.

I have also been reading plenty of books in a variety of genres most recent a YA called Everything, Everything and so glad that the movie followed which stuck close to the book, but what I really liked was the diversity which the author Nicola Yoon was part of the diverse books movement, and also the author was born in Jamaica and that's inspiring for me as a aspiring author. So I hope 2017 will continue be a year in which I work hard on my WIP's and hope for the best, writing a great book takes time and its comforting to come to a place in which I am okay with not rushing and enjoying the process in which I can control.

Beloved spouse

On November 14th 2015 life slowed down
you had slowed down and then the last breath of life left you
you had given the fight of your life.
you left so many that loved you but the choice wasn't yours and we have to accept it wasn't our choice either.

Needing answers that would never come all that is left is the memories
to comfort me to shake me out of a slumber that I dread to take

November 14th 2015 life slowed down
you slowed down and took your last breath
I remember your eyes, I remember your tears

I will always remember you.


Dedicated to my husband who is watching me and his girls until we meet again.

I think I can....

I am in the thick of rewriting, my adult novel (erotica) and also outlining an epic science fiction my second the first I did in 2010 and have not looked at it again.

*waves* checking in.

Its been a crazy few months juggling university and writing, wait this was my update few months ago so I guess its not really a new checking in, but I am happy to pass on my epic fantasy outline is concluded and I am eager to begin writing on a new page. 

Also my adult novel I am almost finished second round of revision and also I cannot wait to move on on the third revision/rewrite for each draft I set a goal what I want to achieve all the drafts will include rewrites but for the first one I worked on high-lightening all my adjectives/adverbs some I had to leave because it made sense for the dialogue or the scene. 

I also utilize a self-editing checklist for fiction writers I found this list years ago and it has proven useful in organizing how the mss is polished. 

I also decided paying for an editor is costly so I will work hard and read plenty of books to help me do my own self editing I believe that I can do so. Also I decided to participate in nanowrimo as I write my new YA and hope one day this dream will become a reality as always happy writing.

Writing is another career if you want it to be

Its March 2015 and I have been having thoughts lately of feeling as if I have failed myself, in my mind and dreams I should be published, but the reality always resurfaced I slacked off and unconsciously writing became a hobby rather than a serious focus which saddened me.

 I think I also lost the focus how to make juggling work; as of late I am pursuing my degree, being a mom to two beautiful girls a nine year old and a fourteen year old , and working full-time is very difficult to juggle along with pursuing my writing dream in addition a challenging situation I continue to deal with. Truthfully at that moment I had to take a pause on many things in order to deal with that matter but the issue is stabilizing itself and I feel I have a brighter perspective and ready to  make a career of my aspiration to get an agent and published.

 I decided to stop belly aching so to speak and juggle my task better, I love Facebook and other social media for the purpose of learning new ideas relating to writing and I was fortunate one day to see  http://www.victoriaschwab.com/ calendar how she juggles school, exercise and her publishing commitments  and that was the starting point for me to be focused on my writing career, which was a huge motivator when stickers are involved I love stickers. Writing 500 words per day has helped me take the edge off so to speak because I am no longer dreaming of  unrealistic things I am setting goals of firstly rewriting one novel at a time and also coming to terms that the first novel I had written needed more editing and also  longer period of time in which I do not look at it because I focused for too long it was the novel that was going to get me an agent and  it may be but truthfully only a few authors have had that awesome experience but later acknowledged they were lucky because the book was not their best even though it sold really well. I also realized to pursue a writing career I must read more often and not only authors I adore but a variety of authors in a variety of genres although romance is still my number one genre. So the focus is to follow my calendar and at the end of the month I will get a sense what took more of my time lately many stickers were for school less on exercising and less on writing because school is taking up much of my time due to assignments, but the days that I have extra time to write I feel great the novel I am currently rewriting is at the 70K mark my aim is for 90K and when I begin the reread/rewrite process again I hope to stay within that range. I will also begin my work out routine working out helped me because it did decrease my stress and improved my self-esteem. I feel more determined and eager to accomplish my writing goals.

Below Victoria Scwab explains the calender/sticker for writing

https://veschwab.wordpress.com/2013/09/08/star-stickers-and-calendars-oh-my-aka-the-best-writing-trick-i-know/

Happy Writing.

Reflection of the past

This is a previous post I wrote in 2013 and I thought its still fitting as 2015 draws closer, I still struggle with balancing my personal life with my creative outlet but I have gotten a little bit better shaken things off (the Taylor Swift song exemplifies this somewhat) so as I stay focus on the same goals of getting published the traditional way its nice to read what I felt back then and the strides I have made.  

So I have hit a rather unfortunate snag in my writing nope its not writers block its stress,the type of stress that seemed to be dimming my many characters voices and that has angered me. I have been enduring a rather difficult situation at work and the stress revolves around the fact I cannot control the outcome--the outcome for me would be to eliminate the situation, to look at individuals who I felt wronged me and block them out so much so it'll seem like I don't know them. I realize that will never happen because its not realistic what is realistic is that I have to roll with the punches so to speak and deal with it, and deal with it means getting on with my life and in time it'll work out for itself. The truths that I am learning from my recent circumstances are as follows. 1. How people interpret what I do what I say is out of my control What is within my control is how I respond which hasn't been the most positive because I have let my anger get the best of me. 2. Its okay to let my guard down Trust is super important to me and I presume for many people that is also important but what I realize is that once I let down my guard I am at risk to get hurt so I can either live in a shell and only let the people I feel safe within my comfort zone or realize although I will get hurt I have to be optimistic that other people that cross my path will be good people. 3. Its okay to not be liked This reflection was difficult for me I use humor many times to hide my discomfort in social situations because my personality is more of a home body anyways as a writer whose pursuing the difficult dream of getting agent and published I realize many times I will judged by my writing; by critique partners/beta readers freelance editors agents/editors etc and majority of time those individuals may not get my writing and that is okay because it will not reflect who I am as a person so the key is to separate the two which is easier said than done. In conclusion writing is is part of me its been long gone from the outlet I utilized to deal with stress and merged to an actual job, a goal that I will persevere at until I get the results that I want which is to be published via the traditional way. Its fitting I write this post as the new year creeps closer, so my goal for 2013 other than getting a agent/published is to learn to deal with my stress better and realize the world I share with includes some people that will hurt me or have values that does not mesh with my values, and I must decide whether I want that hurt or differences in values consume me to the point I cannot focus on my writing or look at it the sensible way which is I am only in charge of me and also I am only human and will learn to be a better person based on my experiences. 

Revision Cave

I must admit an awful truth I have slacked off immensely, well don't be quick to shame me part of the reason is being inundated with university work (wishing I can write everyday, but that won't garner me making a living so I will continue to dream.)

Pacing

When I began writing in summer 2010 ( previous blog post, I mentioned my epic plan) fast-forward to 2014 my epic plans to be agented and published is not a failure, because it's not a race, and I believe that my dream, although hard will happen because I choose to persevere, I have been through so much, first off,  concluding working with initial editor (to be fair I knew nothing of writing) recently being let go by my awesome editor because things had changed between both of us, and that was okay. Deciding to pursue my university degree changed things as well because the delicate balance commenced on top of being a mom, a wife, etc. I realized few days ago I was going about things wrong I was rushing, and in fact, I was not pacing in order to finish a readable manuscript, I am still in love with my original book and at the same time have plenty of ideas as I rewrite it, I am glad I am stubborn because I have not stopped just yet until I finish my first book, when it's all said and done if it becomes a book I hide under my mattress so be it but for now, I will pace to get it done right.


Reading

Part of pacing includes reading I admit I have decreased that, and I have missed out and my muse has suffered that consequence, one thing my second editor told me was to always read because it will enable me to continue learning about the craft and not forget the skills I learned.


Finally, as I write this blog, I am thinking of the amazing, beautiful, courageous Maya Angelou I will leave you with a wonderful poem this poem inspires me in so many ways.


Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Maya Angelou

Source: http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/phenomenal-woman/













Keisha Martin

Resiliency

I have known for a few years in order to make it in the business of publishing the initial step one must undergo is resiliency also referred to as gaining a  'tough skin.' Things change, which may occur at various stages of the writer's journey. I reassure myself often by stating its okay

I have always been the type of person that let things affect me by over thinking  why things happen and blame myself, few years ago I decided I had to work on this, I achieved this by simply telling myself to focus on the things I can change which include:

• Reading often variety of books that teaches various skills of writing a great book, a few years ago I purchased Writing the Breakout Novel workbook by Donald Maas this is a fantastic guide for me as I revise my novel(s) in addition, I have a few more books  specifically for writing YA books, since I write as well for teens.
• Not rushing things, publishing is slow, therefore it would be a shame to send a manuscript that has so many flaws, although the publishing world seems huge its actually quite small and garnering feedback for a manuscript with flaws is not the way I want to go.
• Reading an array of books
• Remembering why I chose to write
• Identifying numerous resources and seeking the help of writers/authors within the community
• In addition, learning the business also include asking questions, such as identify the credentials of an editor.

I could list many more, but these are the main points I tell myself often, and also tell my peers that are also writers, aspiring to be published like me, human beings I think if giving the choice would always want things to work out their own way, to gain perks however that euphoria is a dream, reality is hard sometimes but it teachers humans to be resilient and grow. If I faltered the first time I got a rejection (I so deserved it, I had no clue few years ago what it takes to hone the craft and sent out a batch of horrible writing samples and queries) then I should not be writing, I write because it's what I love and it's what I will fight for by learning and growing and not backing down when the going gets tough.


Happy resiliency to you.






Keisha Martin

ELEVATED by Elana Johnson--interview

Why did you venture into as you mentioned on your website the indie realm of publishing?I ventured into Indie publishing with this book, because I think it's worthy to be published. My agent thought so too, as did some editors. But ultimately, there were no offers for the book from a traditional publisher. That doesn't mean the book isn't good -- for this particular title, it meant the traditional market couldn't support it. But that doesn't mean books have to die anymore. So I published it myself -- and it has been an amazing experience!

Can you tell us a bit about the book?

ELEVATED is about a girl who gets stuck in an elevator with her ex-boyfriend. She hasn't spoken to him in a few months, and she's been keeping some pretty big secrets from him. So there's a lot of drama and angst.

How did you come up with the idea for Elevated (gorgeous cover by the way)
I got the idea for ELEVATED about 5 years ago, when I was visiting a planetarium with my kids. We got in this huge elevator to go up to the dome for a laser light show, and I thought, "What would happen if we got stuck in this elevator?"

So the idea was to write about people stuck in an elevator -- one of my greatest fears! It only took a little bit of thinking to make the people exes.

And thanks on the cover. My amazing friend, Erin Summerill, did an original photo shoot for the cover. I love it too!

What were the best writing moments when you were writing Elevated?

When I decided to turn it into a verse novel! I had been toiling on it for a few months, having written only 100 pages. Nothing was working. Then I had the idea to stretch myself and try writing in a new way: verse. ELEVATED instantly had new life.

How has the journey been from traditional publishing to publishing your indie novel?

It's been great! I've had great support from friends and family, and the only differences I've noticed have been mostly positive. I have really enjoyed turning into a "hybrid" author, where I can still write and publish in the traditional market, but also self-publish books that that market doesn't support.

What’s your favorite scene to write?

I loved writing the scene where Elly sees herself clearly for the first time in months. The first line of the poem is, "I've been living a wax paper life." I absolutely love that line, and her realizations. That was a fun part to write.

What was the hardest scene to write?

The entire end! I always have trouble with endings, and writing ELEVATED was no different.

What do writers need to know prior to self-publishing their novel?

It is just as much -- or more -- work as traditional publishing. You should plan to hire a professional cover artists, interior designer, editor, copy editor, and proofreader. There's nothing to be skimped on if you want to put out a quality product for readers.

Are you planning a series for Elevated?

No. It is a standalone novel. I will be self-publishing another verse novel in September, titled SOMETHING ABOUT LOVE, but it is unrelated in every way to ELEVATED.

ELEVATED (YA contemporary romance) is available now!

Possession, Surrender and Abandon -- all available from Simon & Schuster!

Digital short stories Regret (only 99 cents) and Resist (free!) round out the trilogy.

For more info please check out Elana's blog

Tis the season for my writing goals

Tis the aseason for my annual writing goals, my aspiration to become a published writer began summer of 2009 and since then I feel I have made strides, not agented nor published but my strides come in the way of finishing five books editing one with my lovely editor Lynnette Labelle and still appreciating the love of writing. Also a biggie for me this year was to truly understand how to format my manuscript its imperitive for writers to know this standard for the business, I was very appreciative when my editor returned my chapter and told me to figure out the formatting when I finally got it I was rejoiced but then had an internal battle with myself because I should have known how to format almost like an sixth sense. So my writing goals have and will remain the same writing until I improve and hope for the best that one day my novel will be snatched out of the slush pile and make an agent swoon over my novel happy writing.

Keisha Martin

Keeping up with the Kard...joking just simple me.

Blogging is hard I feel like I am writing for myself because as I scroll through various blogs which most are from writers I realize writers write similar blogs, many talk about the experience of getting stuck with plot(s), the journey of getting agented, the journey of getting published and some offer great writing resources. I read a post today by the awesome Janet Reid regarding agents appreciate writers/authors who have online presence however Janet Reid took this topic a step further and talked about when she is interested in authors she checks out their online presence and checks if the writing skills match the sample she looks at via query or requested pages. That really resonated with me because my first manuscript is still getting polished by my awesome editor but the writing I do on this blog is all me blood sweat and tears.I m pretty good going back and fixing spelling errors but the technical stuff of writing I always stress someone will point out my punctuation is not correct or I have a run on sentence etc which is issues I continue to work on and other known suspects. Janet Reid made perfect sense there has to be consistency in the writing aside from the voice in my opinion for example some days depending on my mood my blog post reflect that and I am an emotional writer in general when I write I really like to show the sorrow, the joy via my words sometimes when my characters are sad I try to write it in a way as if the words are bleeding. So again my ultimate goal is to continue to hone my craft and hope for the best so check out Janet Reid blog although she is not the right agent for me in regards to what manuscripts themes she is looking for she always writes engaging post and has fabulous resources for writers to utilize and I have participated in a few of her contest that are so fun and helps me continue to learn how to craft great intros or scenes. Happy writing Keisha Martin

Back in the groove of writing/reading

Normally toward the ending of July is when I get my writing/reading momentum back in full swing so to speak and also its the time as well in which new ideas tap my muse on the shoulders, and is firmly told to get back in line, it has been a rocky year dealing with plenty of self actualization which normally tended to be beating up on myself, I find I return back on track when I seek the advice of good friends and get their perspective on certain experiences I endured and the theme that I continue to struggle with which is not caring what people think of ME. Wow that is huge and relates so much to writing and the journey towards publishing because a major part of the journey is what people think of writers projects and it's never personal but for a beginner writer pursuing to acquire an agent/published at times it can seem so. The goal then is for me to achieve the goal of thickening my skin a bit more so that when I resume querying I won't let the expected rejections to bring me down and also within my personal life it's darn tooting okay that some people won't appreciate me because they are missing out and also sometimes people not liking me has nothing to do with me and likely more about themselves. Change can only occur when mistakes are not repeated. Keisha Martin

Update and random thoughts.

Its hot in Toronto, but I am not complaining (okay I did) because few months prior I was looking out my window to heavy snow fall, wind, ice, and praying for heat, I use this theme in my books often there is never any middle ground humans in general are never really happy, and even if one attains to equalizing that middle ground I don't think its ever achievable because things always come up. I have been struggling with that theme trying to find equilibrium in my life being a mom, having a great career (off for summer woo hoo) and striving toward firstly acquiring a literary agent and then published. But until that happens I am still revising ECLIPSE almost done I cannot wait for the whole manuscript to be finished and then tackle synopsis (gah) and then the query and hopefully have another novel to query with the first its all easier said than done and will take time so until then my middle ground will be to take my time and enjoy the solace of writing. Keisha Martin

Update

Not really much to update aside from the fact I am a horrible blog writer, been so busy I haven't had the time to get in a consistent routine with my blog writing, also its almost summer break for my kids and me too because I work in the Toronto District School Board and also I have been revising like crazy the last four chapters of my first book a YA paranormal romance yes it has vamps, Greek Gods and Goddess and a snarky, wicked antagonist, endings are super hard, and I am so fortunate my editor Lynnette Labelle is so tough and won't let me settle for a crap ending indeed it was and she caught me I wanted the easy way out and came up with a plot idea that didn't work and really if I was honest with myself I put my self in a corner and to get myself out I came up with a silly plot premise. So that's it a brief update what I have been up to well another big news I will start university in Fall so that will be another thing I have to juggle with writing, although I have a ton of book ideas but the six I have written I will focus on editing them throughout the years and hold onto the challenging but possible dream I will be signed to an agent and published one day. Happy writing.